Turning down offers

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blackmass
Posts: 61
Joined: Thu Jul 17, 2014 2:01 pm

Turning down offers

Post by blackmass » Tue Feb 03, 2015 5:21 pm

I'm curious how people go about turning down offers. For instance, I have three offers at the moment. One of them definitely stands out for me, to the point where I know I would go to it over the other two. That being said, I don't want to visit the other two just for the sake of visiting. One of the schools I'm no longer interested in has contacted me about arranging travel. How do I politely decline and let them know I'm basically turning down my offer for admission?

Haha I realize this is pretty silly, but I just don't like the idea of telling people no and letting them down. Of course I realize this is the name of the game and thousands of students will be turning down schools during this time, but nevertheless, it feels like an awkward thing to do. I also feel like it's a bit rude to tell a school so early in the game that I'm no longer interested.

Anyway, so those of you who've been through this whole process, what did you say to the schools that you turned down? Am I jumping the gun by telling them so early? I don't want to waste their time and resources when I've decided I would rather go elsewhere.

admissionprof
Posts: 369
Joined: Sat Feb 02, 2008 7:50 pm

Re: Turning down offers

Post by admissionprof » Tue Feb 03, 2015 5:31 pm

blackmass wrote:I'm curious how people go about turning down offers. For instance, I have three offers at the moment. One of them definitely stands out for me, to the point where I know I would go to it over the other two. That being said, I don't want to visit the other two just for the sake of visiting. One of the schools I'm no longer interested in has contacted me about arranging travel. How do I politely decline and let them know I'm basically turning down my offer for admission?

Haha I realize this is pretty silly, but I just don't like the idea of telling people no and letting them down. Of course I realize this is the name of the game and thousands of students will be turning down schools during this time, but nevertheless, it feels like an awkward thing to do. I also feel like it's a bit rude to tell a school so early in the game that I'm no longer interested.

Anyway, so those of you who've been through this whole process, what did you say to the schools that you turned down? Am I jumping the gun by telling them so early? I don't want to waste their time and resources when I've decided I would rather go elsewhere.

NO, NO, NO! Don't wait to tell the two schools that you're declining. It is much, much better for them to know now, so they can make an offer to someone else. It is inexcusable to hold onto an offer that you know you'll decline, because you're afraid of being rude. You aren't THAT important, and believe me, they will appreciate hearing as soon as possible. For years I have always been angered by people who hold several offers and wait until the last minute because they want to be nice -- the result is that other students are hurt. Just tell them politely that you've been accepted by a school higher on your list. That's all - no need for explanations.

blackmass
Posts: 61
Joined: Thu Jul 17, 2014 2:01 pm

Re: Turning down offers

Post by blackmass » Tue Feb 03, 2015 6:06 pm

admissionprof wrote:
blackmass wrote:I'm curious how people go about turning down offers. For instance, I have three offers at the moment. One of them definitely stands out for me, to the point where I know I would go to it over the other two. That being said, I don't want to visit the other two just for the sake of visiting. One of the schools I'm no longer interested in has contacted me about arranging travel. How do I politely decline and let them know I'm basically turning down my offer for admission?

Haha I realize this is pretty silly, but I just don't like the idea of telling people no and letting them down. Of course I realize this is the name of the game and thousands of students will be turning down schools during this time, but nevertheless, it feels like an awkward thing to do. I also feel like it's a bit rude to tell a school so early in the game that I'm no longer interested.

Anyway, so those of you who've been through this whole process, what did you say to the schools that you turned down? Am I jumping the gun by telling them so early? I don't want to waste their time and resources when I've decided I would rather go elsewhere.

NO, NO, NO! Don't wait to tell the two schools that you're declining. It is much, much better for them to know now, so they can make an offer to someone else. It is inexcusable to hold onto an offer that you know you'll decline, because you're afraid of being rude. You aren't THAT important, and believe me, they will appreciate hearing as soon as possible. For years I have always been angered by people who hold several offers and wait until the last minute because they want to be nice -- the result is that other students are hurt. Just tell them politely that you've been accepted by a school higher on your list. That's all - no need for explanations.
Thanks for the response. I wasn't really asking about waiting to turn down the offer -- I realize I ought to tell them now that I've made up my mind, as you've pointed out. I don't intend to wait it out, since there's really no reason to. I was just curious how exactly people went about declining offers. Just a polite, "Thank you for the offer, but I have decided to decline"? Or like you've said, "I've received an offer from a school higher up on my list." That's basically what I was looking for -- just bad at these things. And yes, I realize I'm over-analyzing!

astroprof
Posts: 114
Joined: Fri Feb 15, 2008 4:47 pm

Re: Turning down offers

Post by astroprof » Tue Feb 03, 2015 6:23 pm

I concur with admissionprof. The earlier we hear back from students, regardless of their decision, the better. We understand that our institution may not be the best fit for every student. A simple "Thank you for the offer. I was very impressed by the opportunities at your institution, but I have decided to decline your offer at this time." is sufficient. Do not be surprised if you get a follow-up email asking for information about where you have decided to go. We ask this because we'd like to know our competition, not because we want to convince you that we are a better choice. If you have not yet made your final decision, that is fine, but we would appreciate a response once you have done so.

And, by the way, congratulations on having multiple offers already!

blackmass
Posts: 61
Joined: Thu Jul 17, 2014 2:01 pm

Re: Turning down offers

Post by blackmass » Tue Feb 03, 2015 6:28 pm

astroprof wrote:I concur with admissionprof. The earlier we hear back from students, regardless of their decision, the better. We understand that our institution may not be the best fit for every student. A simple "Thank you for the offer. I was very impressed by the opportunities at your institution, but I have decided to decline your offer at this time." is sufficient. Do not be surprised if you get a follow-up email asking for information about where you have decided to go. We ask this because we'd like to know our competition, not because we want to convince you that we are a better choice. If you have not yet made your final decision, that is fine, but we would appreciate a response once you have done so.

And, by the way, congratulations on having multiple offers already!
Thank you! And thanks for the reply. It's definitely been an incredibly nerve-wracking, full-of-second-guessing time! But I appreciate all the help. I will definitely not sit on an offer longer than necessary.

DivineHorseCloud
Posts: 16
Joined: Sun Jul 06, 2014 10:07 pm

Re: Turning down offers

Post by DivineHorseCloud » Tue Feb 03, 2015 7:15 pm

blackmass wrote:
astroprof wrote:I concur with admissionprof. The earlier we hear back from students, regardless of their decision, the better. We understand that our institution may not be the best fit for every student. A simple "Thank you for the offer. I was very impressed by the opportunities at your institution, but I have decided to decline your offer at this time." is sufficient. Do not be surprised if you get a follow-up email asking for information about where you have decided to go. We ask this because we'd like to know our competition, not because we want to convince you that we are a better choice. If you have not yet made your final decision, that is fine, but we would appreciate a response once you have done so.

And, by the way, congratulations on having multiple offers already!
Thank you! And thanks for the reply. It's definitely been an incredibly nerve-wracking, full-of-second-guessing time! But I appreciate all the help. I will definitely not sit on an offer longer than necessary.
Hi, do you mind sharing to which places you've been given offers? I couldn't find your profile in the admissions thread.

Strange_Beauty
Posts: 10
Joined: Fri Oct 31, 2014 2:11 am

Re: Turning down offers

Post by Strange_Beauty » Thu Feb 05, 2015 10:23 pm

blackmass wrote:
admissionprof wrote:
blackmass wrote:I'm curious...o elsewhere.
....That's all - no need for explanations.
Thanks... I was just curious how exactly people went about declining offers. J...s, I realize I'm over-analyzing!
if you want to be polite: Thank you for the great opportunity [ add more flattering words if you wish] to study at your institution. Unfortunately I can attend only one school and have decided that University of ABC is a better fit for my research interest/career. Please don't try to contact me (last sentence: just kidding)

flobadobadie
Posts: 29
Joined: Thu Dec 05, 2013 10:20 am

Re: Turning down offers

Post by flobadobadie » Thu Feb 05, 2015 10:39 pm

And if that doesn't work you can file a restraining order.

dethfire
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Feb 10, 2015 5:33 pm

Re: Turning down offers

Post by dethfire » Tue Feb 10, 2015 5:42 pm

Retracting Acceptance Offer to Graduate School - Consequences?
https://www.physicsforums.com/threads/r ... es.748753/



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